BLESSED

It has been a while since I last wrote..

Alhamdulillah, today I was blessed with the opportunity to have an academic discussion with my phd peer..Agaban..a Sudanese. His insights has undoubtedly enlightened me on many aspects of my dissertation. I know that we should have more of such discussions so as not to be "lonely" in this whole phd journey. Another thing that keeps haunting me is the "reminder" given by one of my lecturers - "you don't want to be a half'-baked phd holder, do you?" and that scares me..:(

Anyway, on a brighter note, I received a few more articles in my email from another dear friend of mine who has been very motivating, supporting, encouraging, etc from the moment I applied to further my studies until today ..my dear friend Suharti..may Allah bless you and Agaban too..

There is still so much to do...may Allah be with me all the way...

Social Development Theory (Vygotsky)

http://www.learning-theories.com/vygotsky-social-learning-theory.html

Kak M*** - Part 2

Last April I wrote about kak M***, my childhood friend, who was my mentor, my role model and still is....actually, she is more of a sister that I do not have. The long period that we are not keeping in touch does not mean we do not remember each other..we in fact keep our numbers..but we just do not call one another..both of us are busy..and I guess we mutually understand the situation but evidently we are still very close at hearts...till today. In this post I am going to reveal another reason why I have been keeping our distance. I mentioned in my April's post that she was well off, the social status kind of thing..honestly, I was just scared that I would feel or be out of place thus the distance. On the few occasions that we met, though, she was still the same old kak M*** that I knew..never once that she made me feel unwanted, out of place..I je yang rasa gitu..can't help it though..
This friendship was renewed on a new level in Syawal 2006 when I called her and told her that I wanted to visit. Strangely, this was the year when I strongly felt like meeting friends that I had not seen for a while. Alhamdulillah, I managed to visit a few. From then on we smsed each other on certain occasions..thanks to the new technology. Last year, she invited me to her daughter's (H) wedding which I attended. Then, she invited me to her grand daughter's 'aqiqah' which I did not attend and she smsed me a few days later asking why I did not come to the ceremony. So I promised to visit in a few days' time. A few days later I went to visit her, H and baby K. I spent a few hours with her and we caught up on so many things. When I reached home after the visit I received this sms from her (which I still keep til this day): Ass'kum Yati..thank you so much for taking your precious time visiting kak M*** n family especially K, I am touched. May Allah swt kekalkan n berkati silaturrahim kita. Thanks again dear. look after yourself. Lots of love - Kak M***. I felt strange then, I sensed something but I just brushed off the thought and replied the sms telling her that the feeling was mutual. Now, I know the answer to the strange feeling..but read on to find the answer. I will definitely keep this one particular sms.
Late Sunday night I came across an fb posting by another daughter of hers mentioning something about "my mama's chemotherapy and radiation begins"..luckily she was still online and I managed to get the necessary information from her....I was speechless, tears kept rolling down and I immediately took wudhu' and performed my solat..I could not really sleep that night, could not wait for Monday morning to come to call kak M***..
Kak M*** was diagnosed with breast cancer about a month ago. She underwent the mastectomy recently. Her chemo sessions will start very soon..
I visited her yesterday and she related the whole thing to me..we talked, we laughed, we cried..but I know she is one strong beautiful lady..,..the strong support from her husband, daughters, sil and other close family members will definitely help her in this challenging time....I know God Willing..she will pull through..
The sms in red above..well, I actually asked her about it and she told me she felt rather "sayu" or a kind of sadness crept into her after I left, thus, the sms that she sent..somehow I related that to this "news".
The memory of the time spent with her yesterday will always be in my mind..I stayed until she had her lunch..soon after that I had to leave for I knew that she needed to rest..she was expecting another visitor later in the afternoon..
Saying goodbye was difficult..she hugged me tight..we exchanged encouragements and promises..and I promised to come back and visit after her 6 cycles of chemo..
The saddest part..as I was walking towards my car..she waved at me and kept on saying bye Ti, bye Ti..repeatedly..of course at this my tears kept rolling down my cheeks..but kak M***, know this.....you are a fighter..I know that...Allah has chosen you for he knows you are capable of facing this challenge ....I will see you in 18-20 weeks time..my prayers will always be with you..

Boarding School?

I did not feel like writing about this earlier but today somehow I feel like writing about this specific..issue? Whatever you want to call it..As a student, particularly, when I was in primary school I really wanted to go to boarding school. Unfortunately, fate had it that it was not meant to be..not that I did not do well in primary school..oh yes I got to stay at hostel but only as a warden when I first started working..had to.. ermm forced to..saya yang menurut perintah..so, when my son was first offered to a boarding school in form 1 I was actually sad that we had to turn it down..the reason: my husband did not want him to go. I failed to persuade him and he was very firm on this, could really see his anger. The second time he was offered a place in another boarding school very near to my house, I thought both of us could rationalize it with the father but it turned out to be that my son had a change of heart..he did not want to go..so, there went my dream. I know that if we were to debate the issue of whether it's better for the children to be at home/in a day school than in a boarding school, there would be endless arguments. At the end of the day it is left to the kid (at his age) to decide..but somehow deep inside my heart I actually wish that he had given it a try..despite the fact that the major obstacle would be to get the father's permission..sigh...

thesis

I went to see Dr S on Tuesday to get advice on the topic for my thesis. After looking at my prospectus and worked on the purpose and objectives his comments were:

- good topic, interesting
- but no soul in it
-you need to read more..

okay..am doing the searching and the reading..

Yesterday I emailed Dr R asking her to be my S. Alhamdulillah positive response..will see her next Thursday. A little bit of progress.

Slowly but surely..

Melbourne from my perspective

My earlier posting on Melbourne is more of things I did and not so much on what I saw and what I thought of Melbourne. Thus, here another posting about Melbourne from my point of view. I was impressed from a short video clip about Melbourne aired on the inflight video/entertainment thingy shown just before we landed about the facilities they have at the Melbourne airport. The existence of the prayer room impressed me the most; at a foreign non-muslim country..good..and I had the experience of performing my solat there on the day that I was to fly back home. It was neither big nor have different sections for male and female but good enough and convenient enough for us to perform our solat...Reminded me of my days in the States where it was difficult for us to find place for solat..pernah solat dlm fitting room rasanya. The train service - for those two days that I used the service it was ok..on time and very convenient. The service connects many different suburbs to the city. Had the experience of riding it during almost peak hours and felt the crowd but could not compare it with the peak hours in Malaysia..won't be fair I think but the system had many coaches at one go so they could ferry more people and avoid sardine-packed scenario I guess. Like many big cities Melbourne city is also busy with many cars and people. Cleanliness..well could see litter and bottles on the pavement in the city and Dandenong but I like the kind of dustbins they put in public places as shown in the pic above. I saw the dustbins at Monash Uni. I think I dare say that Melbourne is a true city of multiracial and multicultural city. Just by being at Melbourne Central I could see many people of different races and cultures. There were of course Aussies but there were also many Chinese, Indians, Malays, Vietnamese, Bengals and others that I could not identify. You could see ladies with "tudung" quite often and I was even approached by someone (could not tell her nationality) for sadaqah so she said..minta sedekah..argh in Melbourne pun ada peminta sedekah. It was easy to get halal food in Melbourne city as well as in other suburbs such as Dandenong. You can get nasi beriyani, nasi ayam, fried noodles, roti canai, murtabak, tosai even vadai. They even have halal KFC though only one and halal Nando's..kira oklah where food is concerned....but of course food is expensive if you convert to RM. On academic front, I heard different stories from different people..some positive some negative..my conclusion, mana-mana pun sama.. just take up the challenges and pray that your journey is blessed and guided by the One. Enough for now...;))

MELBOURNE

Alhamdulillah praise be to the AlMighty for the oportunity to visit Suharti and family in Melbourne. It was initially Su's suggestion that I sent in an abstract for the First Monash Postgraduate Conference on Theoretical and Applied Linguistics. I knew then whether it would be accepted or not I would be going..alone.. and later when I mentioned it to my SIL and she wanted to come along the desire to go strengthened. Alhamdulillah as it turned out the visit materialised..June 27 to July 4. As I told Su when I arrived at Melbourne airport..I never dreamed to go to Melbourne..that was before I knew how much I could get for the fare..everything changed when I knew I had to pay only RM*** for the fare and thanks to dearest hubby..his job I mean. Of course he allowed me to go on the pretext of attending the conference but later tried to persuade me not to go after knowing that I would not be presenting....but this time around I was a bit "kering hati"..dah bawa pergi HK oklah kan..now I had a conference to attend ok..

We arrived at Melbourne Airport at about 730 pm. Su and Wafir came to fetch us and took us straight to Dandenong where they were staying. It was cold about 6C. The next day Su was supposed to take us out to the city. Unfortunately, something went wrong with the sewerage system at her house and she needed to wait for the plumber to come as the backyard was already flooded. We initially waited thinking that the prob could be solved but it turned out that they had to call the the city council people to come as it was under their jurisdiction. So Su decided that we went with her two daughters dulu if not tak sempat coz it got dark very early now as it was winter. So we went as kak Izan had to meet up some friends at the city. Kak long (Insyirah), kak ngah (Izzati) and I enjoyed ourselves at the city particularly at the Melbourne Central..kira habislah Melbourne Central we all teroka and a few places nearby such as the State Library and Myers. We had lunch at Es Telaar an Indonesian restaurant..the food was not bad. Su was not able to join us as the repair work took up longer than expected but it was fine with us.

The next day we went to the Dandenong Market..terus beli souvenirs..macam-macam ada..not bad for souvenirs...affordable....and got something for myself..had been wanting it for a while..everytime pergi IKEA dok tgk benda tu..now I got it ..alhamdulillah..from the market we went home and got the children ready for a trip to DFO Murobbin..DFO stands for Direct Factory Outlet..got a few pieces of Corning..ada sale..geram je tengok..very cheap but thinking about how to carry them in our limited baggage tu tak jadi beli..but I got a few pieces which are going to be fully utilised back home..have not seen such kind in Msia rasanya..got a school bag for Adam as well..promised to get him one..was a good buy I think..Kak ngah and kak long got a few things for themselves as well..then we went straight home as it was already getting dark..That night we went out for dinner except for the two girls and Wafir..we wanted to go to Sentosa Cafe..a cafe owned by a Singaporean but it was closed so we ended up at an Afghan restaurant..delicious naan and kebab but a very big portion for an order..sampai kena bawa balik..

On Wednesday we went to Monash Uni, Clayton campus as Su had to run a few errands..thus we got the chance to take a look at the campus..Su's office, the student centre, the religious centre, library building etc. posing here and there..and the most important thing dapat a number of articles that might be useful for my thesis..I owed Su for this..appreciate it so much...tapi belum baca lagi..still in my thumbdrive didn't even get the chance to even peek at it..tak pe soon...from Monash Su took us to Dandenong Plaza..went to KMart..looked around the plaza and tukar duit lagi..then Su took us to one Indian shop..MKH if I was not mistaken..had late lunch..roti telur and vadai..we also went to Marmara halal meat market..awesome..varieties..macam-macam ada..back home..Su prepared sphagetti bolognese for us..we bought so many kinds of biscuits from Coles but I just couldn't recall whether we bought them on this day or the day before...

Thursday was the conference day..we were at the campus the whole day and kak Izan stayed at home to babysit the children..The conference was a great experience for me..met a number of Malaysian PhD students besides Shahiza yang I memang kenal from Malaysia..Rami, Azwan, Fandi, Riam among others..the papers presented were an eye opening..salute to Fandi for doing Functional Grammar..we need one at home..Anita from Indonesia and Sarah, both are pg students at Monash. It was a long day for us..at home Su and Wafir had barbecue dinner for us..delicious lamb steak..lain rasanya..the baked sweet yam, mashed potatoes and the beans..thanks again to Su and Wafir and of course the kids..Wafir dok grilled the lamb and chicken at the backyard dlm sejuk2 tu...may Allah bless the family..

Already Friday..how time flied..Su took us to another market in a different district..Caribbean Market..Dandenong Market offered more but Carribean's surrounding area was beautiful..unfortunately it rained so we could not take lots of pics..we went back to Dandenong Market bought more souvenirs and later to Savers..haiyaa..interesting and cheap..got 4 crytal glasses..so cheap..2 for me and 2 for kak Izan..and kak Izan got one lovely jacket..her forever tiger stripes thingy but beautiful indeed. We were actually rushing for time as we had promised Fakhriyah (a friend from Masters days at UPM who is now doing her phd in language policy at Melb Uni) to have tea at her house at 3 but Savers kept us til after 3..apologised to Facky but she was ok with it..we went home first to pray and Su had to prepare something for Wafir as he came back early on Friday..then off to Fakhriyyah's place..beautiful home, delicious curry noodle and battered prawn..spent more than two hours to catch up there and off we went ..thanks Fakhriyyah for the delicious food and the time spent..

Already Saturday, we left Su's home at about 830 with Su, Wafir and Irfan to the city as Wafir had to get something from his office..while waiting for him sempat gak berposing dgn Su somewhere dekat2 Flinders St tu. On our way to Sha's place at Reservoir, Wafir took us through Sydney Road where we could find a row of halal shops and restaurants...Halal Nando's could also be found on that street as we found out later from Nabil, Haslaile's husband. Haslaile (my exstudent at SMPW) is doing her PhD in biomed at RMIT..am proud of her. Su had to rush home..she needed to attend to many things as she was flying off to Brisbane very early the next day for another conference..so we parted there..looking forward to seeing each other again this coming December for her summer vacation in Malaysia....and I made her promise to come to my house when she is back..rasa terhutang budi ni..hehehe..

At Sha's, I met Emy Sha's soon to be ex roommate as she was moving to Geelong. Despite her initial plan to leave that Saturday afternoon, she came along with us to the city which resulted in her delaying her trip to Geelong to the next day..thanks Emy..we took the tram from Flinders to Melb Central then we went to Victoria Market. The Souvenir items were a bit more expensive than Dandenong but of course being the centre of attraction for tourists..luckily we had already bought ours at Dandenong. After jalan2 and posing2 at Vic Market we had our late lunch at a kopitiam where we had nasi ayam, nasi kandar, beef noodle and roti canai..have to say that the roti canai was actually delicious..the roti and the curry..Sha had to attend a dinner at LTU that night and I had the opportunity to have a chat with Emy..great opportunity..and later Haslaile and hubby came to visit..we had a long chat of course since we last met in 1998 when she was in form 5..12 years ago....both of them said "tak sempat teacher datang rumah we all, next time datang duduk rumah we all je"..InsyaAllah, ada rezeki next visit ok..and thanks Layle and Nabil for coming all the way from Coburg..may Allah bless both of you..

Sunday..time to leave but our flight was scheduled at 3 so ada masa to chat lagi..after savouring fried noodle from Sha's kitchen specially prepared by chef Sha, Norhadaliza, my classmate masa form 2 and 3 at CBN came over..after 26 years..thanks Hada for coming..of course tak cukup masa to catch up but the opportunity to meet was worth it..and then came the time to bid farewell to Hada and Emy. Sha sent us to the airport and waited until we went into the boarding hall..we reached KLIA at about 945pm and were greeted by my dearest hubby and children about an hour later...Stories of this trip were represented by more than 100 pics which some I share on my facebook..A trip which was educational and fun..alhamdulillah..

A REMINDER?

It is already June..how time flies..didn't write anything in May...wanted to but....ok no excuses...

As I am writing this I am actually listening to a song "You're my Everything"..don't remember the original singer but I know it is a very old song but still touches the heart whenever I listen to it..why the song? I saw a video clip of the song sung by a different singer..again cant remember his name..it brought back memories of past times..nothing in particular but there was a period in my life when this song made its relevance...

A few days ago I visited a teacher at my children's school who is suffering from breast cancer..she is now at home..taken care by her mum..seeing her serves as a reminder to me that the end of the road is not very far....the questions who we are, why we are sent to the world and where shall we go back to at the end of this life's journey come back knocking and of course reminds me that I have not done enough..thus, I should do more...pray harder, give more..do everything that is necessary...InsyaAllah, I pray that Allah will guide me through this journey..

Women-only coaches

I am all for this move by KTM though I am not a regular user of KTM commuters. I could relate to the uneasiness being in crowded coaches from a few occasions when I had to take the commuter and especially during peak hours..oh my..the sardine packed coaches were simply..beyond words..you have to experience it to know it..lucky those who do not have to depend on such public transportations (not to mention the traffic jam though)... Should try it one of these days..

Kak Mala

Last week I had the opportunity to visit a childhood friend of mine who is actually six years older. Despite the age difference, we could get along well..and way into our forties..of course with keeping silence for quite a while in between... with our own busy lives with family and kids..

This friendship started when I was still in primary school..can't recall exactly when..probably when I was 7 or 8 and she was already 13 or 14 then..

She had just welcomed an additional member of her family..a grand daughter..thus, my visit..

I am happy that we are still friends for I can truly see the real person in her..such a humble person..despite all the worldly things that she has..

The two hours that I spent with her taught me a few things..some of the things she said made me really think hard of life..she made me see things in a new perspective...made me reconsider a few things that I was planning to do...

Life is not a material thing..especially at this age..May Allah bless this friendship..and guide us till the end..

Quintillian

Marcus Fabius Quintilianus (Quintillian) was a theorist whose thoughts thousand years ago were still in practice. He emphasized the science of correct expression. He was concerned with the practice of virtue through speech i.e the science of good speech instead of the art of clever speaking. To him to be a good orator one should be a good man. In addition, one needs to have linguistic expertise which is acquired through a good programme of linguistic studies. A good orator is not only a gifted speaker but also a trained speaker.

Quintillian was of the view that persuasion in itself is not a noble goal. He posited that evil men can persuade more effectively than good men (how true). To him the practice of Rhetoric (a verbal persuasion) could lead to a corrupt educational system, a corrupt society and corrupt leaders. Hence, he emphasized on the importance of acquiring good habits of conduct and good speech in the very earliest years of one's life (this is actually very islamic..Islam emphasizes on this..so, I would say his thoughts were actually based on Islamic values). Any pedagogic programme that survived from the ancient world is said to owe to Quntillian's contributions. Many of his thoughts on pedagogy were still relevant in present context. That I find interesting.

HK

Alhamdulillah..praise be to Allah for making our trip to HK possible..also zillion thanks to my sister Nora for sponsoring the trip..I at least saved 50% of the expenses..and all for the children but I guess they deserved the trip..Ameer and Anis..it was for you..as for Adam..you must be grateful for being able to "tumpang sama"..

I have not been out of Malaysia after coming back from the States..so kira excited like the kids as well..have to admit it though initially I had doubts of going..money does matter..but I kept telling myself..do this for the children..they have shown you something..this is not like I do it often..so ok..off we went..

HK..very crowded..sooo many people but very efficient MTR...we could actually go anywhere..even Adam found it easy at the MTR stations..he was actually faster than us...halal food was also easy but mostly Indian food..beriani and naan stuff but we like them so it was okay..the garlic naan was definitely delicious..very soft and the curry, masala etc..they were just marvelous so much so we just had to have it the last night we were there..

I was actually looking for halal chinese food..got one address from the web and also from reviews by others..found the address on Ashley Road Kowloon but..the restaurant was not there..there was another brand new restaurant..I guess they had closed shop..so I thought there goes my chinese food..would not be able to taste the authentic chinese food I thought..we were to leave for home the next day...

On the day that we were to fly home we went to the airport early to send off my SIL as she was taking MAS..ours was at night..so we had a few more hours to enjoy HK and to my delight my dearest other half said that we were going to Wan Chai to have our chinese food lunch..so we got to experience HK airport express as well which cost us HKD450 for a round trip for the five of us..tak pe chinese food punya pasal..

Got to Wan Chai..found Ammar Mosque..found the canteen..got to solat there..got a pair of NIKE, shin guard for Ameer, socks for Adam....got a taste of another part of HK island..alhamdulillah..then off to the airport..the MTR and airport express made it possible within a few hours..

Forgot to mention the hotel...verrrry small..beyond imagination..no place to solat so had to solat atas katil..luckily only for subuh..others we performed at the mosque (Kowloon Mosque)..but the loacation of the hotel was verrry convenient..very near to Yau Ma Tei MTR station so we could easily go anywhere we like without hassle..no transportation woes..and verrry near to the ladies night market..we went there every night..to get stuff..hehehe..traveling with a tight budget gitulah..but we managed to go to Cityget outlets too..got a pair of reebok and Ameer's chelsea jersey..good buy kira oklah..other than that things are expensive...

All in all 4 days is not enough..kalau boleh nak pergi lagi..hehe..

Immigration Dpt

I haven't been to the immigration department except for one time when I had to do things regarding my maid's permit. I did not even go there personally for my international passport as the matter was handled by the moe then. I had to go last Saturday.

I just could not imagine how things would be there so I was quite surprise to see the scenario..people everywhere..it turned out I could not even get the number..my my..so I went down looking for the rest of the family members who went down earlier after seeing the crowd..oh..I was at damansara ok..and came this woman..cik nak buat passport..ada nombor..nak nombor..RM70..what!! that would be RM280 for 4 people..of course I was not that stupid to take up the offer..mad..yes I was mad..senang-senang je nak cari duit..and as I was having my tea (after meeting the rest of the clan) I related the story to my hubby and an indian man who was sitting nx to him overheard our conversation and interrupted..he said someone tried to sell the numbers to him for RM150 per person..perrgh..

My experience at wangsa maju yesterday was not that bad..except for a few not so friendly utterances and gestures from the staff and the looong queue (rather than paying Rm280 just to get the numbers) I found that the idea of having the registration department just next door was an excellent move as I had two unforeseen circumstances (in my case and of course others as I could see people from the immigration dpt were also there) where I had to go and (1) renew adam's birth certificate (2) renew ameer's ic

We reached the department before 730 and accomplished our mission at around 1pm and that was because we had to deal with both the immigration and the registration departments.. and of course the children had to sacrifice school..

Off to KLCC for lunch as the father wanted to c us and have lunch there...and they asked for subway sandwiches..argh..memanglah sedap but..tak pelah..once in a while..the father was a bit late and said ingat nak ajak mkn nasi goreng ikan masin sedap kat atas tu...nx time tell me in advance ok..(called him earlier, didn't anwser, in a meeting)..

Reached home at about 615pm...thanks to duke..bayar toll mahal tapi cepat sampai..but kalu x yah bayar tol lagi bagus..from kl to my house taking duke I will have to fork out RM7.6o one way..

KRK SMKBS2

I am contributing a small part to the success of the KRK activities for my daughter's school...It seems with the mum's involvement the girl is more motivated..oh..she has had her whines, grunts, ooh, aah, hate this, hate that...and yes the word is "HATE"...

That was rather a challenge which I did not antcipate earlier on...the disappointment in her was rather scary..really had to counsel her, motivate her, remind her of qada n qadar as well as rezeki from Allah...alhamdulillah, she has moved on...looking ahead optimistically..though..a little ooh..aah..sometimes...guide us ya Allah..

I am back

Oh it has been sooooo long...in many occasions I have things to write but circumstances do not allow me to do my jottings..there are also many times that the big "L" hit me..regret it but I know I won't be getting back the lost time...so..I really hope this renewed zest that I have will help me go through these crucial times...help me ya Allah..I really need your help....I want to complete this journey so that I can give back...